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Pick up and Put Down Sleep Training Method
Getting an infant into a routine is not an easy task. Babies are demanding and need constant attention from caregivers. They cry for food, they cry in discomfort, they cry when they are ill, and they cry when they are restless. It is hard to get them to sleep without a prop or the warmth of the mother’s bosom to lull them into sleep. With all this, it becomes every mother’s search to find the right technique to make the baby less dependant on her for sleeping and to keep the baby asleep for longer. We discuss a technique known as the 'pick up, put down' or PUPD technique which works well for babies below the age of 1 year.
What Is 'Pick up and Put Down' Sleep Method?
This technique involves putting your baby down during nap time while the baby is still awake. If the baby isn’t fussing or if his slight gibberish calls are not too persistent, you try to leave the room. If this distresses your child, wait at the door while watching and listening. If the baby is continuing to feel distressed and is getting worked up, then you would go back and pick him up and calm him for one minute or two. Now put the baby back in the crib or bed while still awake. Repeat this process until the child falls into a deep sleep.
At What Age You Can Use 'Pick up Put Down' Method for Your Baby?
This technique is best used for babies who are older than 3 months of age. It is ideal for infants up to the age of one year and sometimes works for babies who are just a little bit older than that. It is also a technique that some babies may find stimulating instead of relaxing and it may not work for such babies.
Tips to Consider Before Starting PUPD Method
Before you decide to start using the 'pick up, put down' method, you should do the following consistently:
Create consistency in baby’s bedtime. Our children’s body clock matures with time, and it becomes easier for us to understand their sleep patterns. By understanding this rhythm, you can create their sleeping pattern centred around that.
Make sure to develop signals that calm your baby and make them understand that it is night and that this is a time for sleeping. Have soft lullabies played for 20-30 minutes before bedtime and make sure that there is no noise, no bright screens or lights when you are getting ready to turn the baby in for the night.
Create a lull and put the baby down on the bed before he is asleep - when he is drowsy but awake.
How to Use Baby Pick up and Put Down Method?
Have a key phrase like ‘nap nap time’ or ‘ sleepy time now’ which you often use as a signal to calm baby when he cries at the first put down. Reassure him gently each time.
Pick up the baby again if he doesn’t seem reassured and make sure to say the key phrase a couple of times more.
Once the baby stops crying but is still awake, put him back in the crib. Do not stop if the crying starts even before you have set the baby down completely.
If the crying continues, then pick up the baby once more and repeat the key phrases and the calming. Do this until you feel the baby is settling down.
Once the baby seems more settled, then do not pick him up again. Place your hand on the chest or back and talk gently using key phrases.
Leave the baby’s room at this point.
If the crying starts as you leave, stop, listen, and observe. If the crying becomes louder, then start once again and repeat all the steps until the baby sleeps.
How Long Does PUPD Technique Take to Work?
The technique may take as little as 5 days to show changes or as long as three weeks before you see a consistent pattern. Everything depends on the baby’s temperament and the consistency with which the routine is followed.
What Are the Pros and Cons of Picking up and Putting Your Baby Down for Sleep?
As with any method, there are pros and cons to the PUPD technique as we have listed below.
Pros
With this method, the parent can stay in the room with the baby until the baby is in a deep sleep.
The parent also has ample chance to comfort the baby while he learns to sleep by himself.
The PUPD is not too rigid, yet has a structure to it unlike other methods such as the fading method which involves removal of sleep props for a longer duration.
Cons
The method is very physically exhausting for the parents and baby.
If the baby doesn’t sleep well at night, this technique will involve much picking up and waking hours can last for more than 2 hours. Consistency becomes questionable with such a tiring schedule.
Some babies find the picking up stimulating, and some begin thinking of it as a game. This can become frustrating for baby and mom.
Having more than one child makes this technique tedious because you have to tend to the other child as well.
Parents sometimes get confused about when and what duration the picking up should last.
Tips to Adapt 'Pick up, Put Down' Method According to the Age of Your Child
The PUPD method can be tweaked to suit infants of different age groups between 4 months to 12 months.
For 4-6 Months
Here is what you can try for babies between 4 months and 6 months.
Hold the little one for an upper limit of five minutes. If you don’t see signs of settling, put the baby down. Pick him up if he shows no signs of letting up on the crying.
Do a pat-pat or a shushing in between pick-ups and put-downs while the baby is still in the cot.
Pick baby up again if the key phrasing doesn’t seem to work.
Put baby down as soon as the crying lets up, the baby looks drowsy or seems to be settling.
For 6-8 Months
For your 6 to 8 months old, try the following because you need to imitate baby’s pace.
Resist picking up baby immediately in response to their stress. Offer your hands in a ‘let me get you’ kind of gesture. If the baby responds by reaching out, then pick him up.
Do not sway or rock your baby at this age. Cradle him and use the shushing phrases. Do not lock eyes with the baby and put him down after you have done your patting-shushing routing.
Follow baby’s pace and put your hand on his back as he settles. But understand if he likes it or not and continue accordingly.
For 8-12 Months
By 8 months you need to look at following some of these points with your little one because he doesn't need to be picked up as much anymore.
When baby tries to pull himself up, place him down very gently, but facing away from you.
Focus on the key phrases because the baby has started recognising your voice.
Start gradually retreating from the room after put-downs and see how this works out.
Additional Tips to Make 'Pick up, Put Down' Method Work
Pick up put down method for naps can be made easier by following these additional tips:
Make sure that nap time and night time sleep are timed appropriately for the age of the infant.
Create a solid winding down routine that involves soft music, dim lights, etc.
Rest well before you have to put baby to bed because you need the energy.
Understand the difference between a fuss and distress by listening attentively to baby.
As the bring it down-pick it up routine is very physically taxing, take turns with your partner or get additional help for yourself.
A steely resolve and a strong back are essential for this method to work. If you feel like you have what it takes, you will soon enjoy the fact that your baby can put herself to sleep without all the fuss and distress that usually accompanies sleep time.
Also Read:
Sleep Training Methods & Tips for Babies
Controlled Crying: Baby Sleep Training Method
Ferber Sleep Method for Baby Read more
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Are You Raising a Spoiled Brat? By a Mom of a Bullied Kid
“Abey loser, tujhe khelna nahi aata. You can’t be in my team”.
“He is an ullu. Maths aur Science mein usko zero mila hai, toh obviously ullu hi hai na woh?”
“Oye, paani leke aao, mujhe mud pizza banana hai”.
“Aree aaj mere friends aaye hai, toh mein unke saath kheloongi. Tumse katti!”
“Jaa be Marathi” (I am a non-Marathi, still it made me cringe)
Such are the conversations I get to hear among kids nowadays. There are no constant friends or constant enemies, but there sure is this consistency in the rudeness that is dished out by the self-proclaimed “smart kids” towards the “ordinary ones” in their eyes. More often than not, these kids are accompanied by their didis or caregivers who are paid to take care of them but not empowered to discipline them. In fact, they are treated much worse by these brats. So, parents like me, whose kids often find themselves at the receiving end of these outbursts from kids, are forced to discipline them, notwithstanding the consequences.
We had just shifted into the complex when my daughter started interacting with this boy of a similar age. He seemed to have trouble controlling his temper and used to hit the kids for all and sundry reasons. After one or two such incidents involving my daughter, I forbid her from playing with the boy. It was three months since the incident and once again my daughter came to interact with the boy through some mutual friends. I kept a keen eye on the boy, knowing his temperament. I wasn’t wrong either. He drank a mouthful of water and spat on my younger daughter’s face. Her fault? She was a 9-month-old infant sitting in her pram, enjoying her evening stroll and looking at her sister play. It was the first time in my life that I got angry at a kid who was not related to me. But I knew that if I didn’t put my foot down, this bullying would continue. Complaining to his caregiver was of no use at she herself was being called “paagal”, “kutti” and much more by the kid. I talked to her a few days after the incident and came to know that the boy behaves in a similar manner at home too.
I remember my stay in China and observing the kids there. China had a one-child policy for quite a long time. So most of the kids that I met there were single children. With both parents working, the kids are mostly taken care of by their grandparents. And like grandparents all over the world, Chinese grandparents too are putty in the hands of their grandchild (most often their only grandchild). They wait on them and run around them all through the day, feeding them, running behind with hand fans and buying them whatever they ask for. Most of these kids, having grown up all alone with not even cousins to bond with, behave extremely selfishly and don't even know the meaning of sharing. So incidents of altercations in parks and play areas became a daily event there. I used to feel so proud of parents back home whose kids are taught to be polite, encouraged to share and chided for acting selfishly. I came back to India after 2-and-a-half years in China to find out that things were changing in India too.
Being a stay-at-home mom, I often get asked if I have a nanny to take care of my kids. They seem surprised when I answer in the negative. It has become a norm in most households to have nannies for kids even if parents or grandparents are at home to take care of the kids. It gives the mothers much-needed me-time and makes the kids less dependent on them. But it also means that the kid is mostly under the care of people whose nature might mould the behaviour of the child. I have observed kids undergoing radical changes in their talking patterns, food habits and social behaviour influenced by their caregivers. I see didis running around their wards, spoon-feeding them in between their playtime when they are more than capable of feeding themselves. By making our kids less dependent on us, we are making them and ourselves more dependent on their nannies- the same ones who have no rights to discipline our kids in case of misdemeanors but have to listen to our taunts in case the kid complains about them being even a bit critical of his/her behaviour. It would be advisable to discretely observe your kid’s interaction with his/ her playmates to understand if you are unintentionally raising a rude kid. Empower your nannies to at least stop your kids from bullying younger ones.
I was a product of a generation that advocated corporal punishment. Any unacceptable action or behaviour was dealt with promptly either at home or at school. But today, the moment my daughter complains to me about how her teacher gave her a black mark in her behaviour chart, I start questioning the teacher’s behaviour. We are scared to discipline our own kids for fear of their reaction. So you cannot expect more from their nannies than to follow your lead. Kids have been cocooned into this soft treatment that they react very badly at any indication of disappointment from their parents. I do not advocate for a return to the days of corporal punishment. But neither do I support the view that wrongdoings only deserve a note in the diary or a mark in the behaviour chart.
Being a parent is a huge responsibility, not just to your child and family but also to the society at large and consequently the whole world. What we choose to teach our kids defines how they grow up to be. If good behaviour is not encouraged with a pat on the back, if bad attitude is not nipped at the bud with some form of punishment, then sooner than later we would end up complaining about how ugly the society is turning out to be. Let’s teach our kids to be more caring, less selfish, mindful of others’ sentiments and make them stronger to face their lives ahead.
P. S: I try my best not to resort to corporal punishment at home. A day off the TV, a day with no playtime outside, a lecture on the mistake that was committed by her and handing over extra chores for the day are the punishments that I dole out and these have been quite effective. Every parent needs to figure out what will work with their child. Failing to discipline kids fearing that it would make them sad is not the way forward.
Disclaimer: The views, opinions and positions (including content in any form) expressed within this post are those of the author alone. The accuracy, completeness and validity of any statements made within this article are not guaranteed. We accept no liability for any errors, omissions or representations. The responsibility for intellectual property rights of this content rests with the author and any liability with regards to infringement of intellectual property rights remains with him/her.
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Breastfeeding is boon for both mother and lil bundle of joy
Dear mom,I can understand , u r in extreme pain after my delivery, me and u both are not trained for breastfeeding, but mom I promise u, I will learn soon ,but please u don't loose hope , mom it will create a strong bond between us , ur milk LL develop my immunity , mom it LL prepare me to fight all these virus like corona etc..mom u know the probability of breast cancer LL also reduce, and my lovely mom , u LL feel more happy,,, but mom u LL require more energy to feed me,so please take the healthy meal like meal full of protein, carb and lots of mineral, mom please don't skip the breakfast . and please never forget to take calcium tablet during these time, I love u Mumma,, and Mumma one most important thing please take proper rest , if u LL get tired , ur milk secretion will be reduce so how LL I enjoy exclusive breast feed for 6 month? And mom if u are facing the problem of low milk secretion , so please take satawari powder , cumin water, it will help u , mom some Mumma suffer from mastitis ( cracked nipple) , if u please take medical help immediately, mom as I LL grow I LL bite everything due to my dentition , so might be I bite ur nipple , please take care of it , and has Mumma please massage my gums with ur clean finger , it would help me..and Mumma , there is no harm in breastfeeding in lying position , if u feel tired, I LL feed in lying position ,Mumma I know u are not feeling well after few week of delivery, but mom please try to clean ur breast ever , Mumma every time when I come to u I don't need feed but sometimes I only want to pamper by you, just want to play with ur breast ,so please let me allow to play with ur breast,and Mumma u can introduce me bottle during 4 month , just pump ur milk or formula milk give me in bottle, I LL easily accept it , mom after my 6 month please introduce me with lots of fruits and vegge with ur milk , please don't give me cow milk for 1 year , if u prepare some puree or kheer for me after 6 month, kindly add mother milk or formula milk,happy breastfed to all mom from their child Read more
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Breast feeding importance , advantages to baby ,tips for new Mother
Pregnancy is an important phase in every woman's life ofcourse marriage too but pregnancy is rebirth of woman.
Although we have been upgrading with technology , inventions, medicine advanced treatments the thing that doesn't changed which is natural process the beauty of motherhood - Breast feeding.
The good thing is many are aware of breast feeding advantages and are choosing breast feeding these days rather bottle feeding.
Advantages of Breast feeding
* Contains all minerals and nutrients
* Improves immunity power
* Brain development elements
* Soothes baby,jaw exercise
* Controls mother's weight
* Mother and baby Bonding
* Relives from post partum stress.
* Avoid chances of breast cancer in women.
For lactating mother have to prepare while Pregnancy doing regular nipple massages and after delivery clean nipples including lactating foods in diet , following hygiene (cleaning nipples, hands before and after feeding).
$ Garlic milk
$ Garlic cloves in Curries
$ Poppy seeds
$ Papaya (raw papaya curry)
$ Chikoo (Sapota)
$ Rusk
$ Bread toast/roasted bread
$ Milk and diary products
$ Having more water, giving frequent feeds will increase milk supply.
Until 1.5 - 2 years doctors suggesting breast feeding if mother having no health issues .
But breast feeding to toddlers is difficult task when compared to infants as we women face a lot of issues while feeding in public,we think of going outside mostly the dressing,comfort and essentials and all bla bla bla.. Though we have feeding rooms/blocks in many public places for feeding mothers we feel bit awkward to feed a toddler because their tantrums, to carry feeding essentials, hurry burry we mostly prefer not to go out right !!!

If you are one of them then let's break this Breastfeed your toddler ,plan trips enjoy your day /trip with BELLA MAMA Maternity and feeding kurtas👗 and essentials now offer is going on... If you are a pregnant 🤰or Breastfeeding Mom 🤱or planning for pregnancy 👣then why late grab soon🛍️🛍️💃...
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Dr Vandan H Kumar has added a new answer
Guardian of 0 children
3 hours ago
Q. which bath tub is suitable for a new born baby
Dr Vandan H Kumar
Paediatrician
3 hours ago
A. the child should be comfortable in the bathtub and you can choose from one which is available in the shopping section and here you can ask questions related to the health of child and mother
Dr Ghouse has added a new answer
Expecting Mom due in 5 months
2 hours ago
Q. Hlo
I have tailbone pain in the 5th month of pregnancy.. What is the reason for it? What should I do?
Dr Ghouse
Paediatrician
1 hour ago
A. N simple pressure no problem. if there is no relief it is better you see your doctor for proper examination particularly physical examination if there is need for doing investigations to find out the problem and treatment ok
Dr Ghouse has added a new answer
Expecting Mom due this month
33 mins ago
Q. Hi, my AFI is 6.5...doctor suggested for induction...is it ok or shall I ask to wait for 2 weeks
Dr Ghouse
Paediatrician
31 mins ago
A. definitely the levels are very less there is need to take proper decision vif there is no relief it is better you see your doctor for proper examination particularly physical examination if there is need for doing investigations to find out the problem and treatment ok
Dr Ghouse has added a new answer
Guardian of 0 children
30 mins ago
Q. how long should I give d3 syrup for babies
Dr Ghouse
Paediatrician
29 mins ago
A. you can give up to 6 months to one year also ok. if there is no relief it is better you see your doctor for proper examination particularly physical examination if there is need for doing investigations to find out the problem and treatment ok
Dr Priyanka Kalra has added a new answer
Guardian of 0 children
28 mins ago
Q. I got skin tags during pregnancy, what should I do for that..any cream recommendation...
Dr Priyanka Kalra
Obstetrician and Gynaecologist
9 mins ago
A. wait a year. see a lot of brands are available to allure you. you should get prescription n adhere to products manuals. avoid too expensive and see to good brands with guarantee ok. for skin lesions avoid rough handling. try to put only medicated ointment. keep up with the doctor who can see and advise. don't miss on any medicine for best results.
Dr Vandan H Kumar has added a new answer
Guardian of 0 children
27 mins ago
Q. what is the purpose of giving d3 syrup for babies
Dr Vandan H Kumar
Paediatrician
25 mins ago
A. you have to continue vitamin d3 supplement till you are not able to take the child in sunlight for at least 10 minutes daily.
before 1 year of age : if you are giving 400 units you have to give 1ml everyday and if you're giving 800 units you have to give 0.5 ml everyday.
the thing is that you have to keep the child in sunlight for at least 10 to 15 minutes daily between 9 a.m. to 5 p.m. for proper vitamin d exposure.
so if you are able to take the child in sunlight you can stop vitamin d supplement.
after 1 year of age vit d drops dosage is 0.7ml once a day from 800units vitamin d drops.
vitamin D is required for many metabolic processes in the child as well as for the growth and development of the bones and development of the tooth
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