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14 Tips to Encourage Your Child to Identify and Express His Feelings
Small children deal with the same emotions that we adults do. They get angry, sad, happy, frustrated, jealous or embarrassed, and they may not be able to express these emotions in words. So instead they show them with actions, which often may result in crying or screaming, and unpleasant tantrums. At that age, children have difficulty identifying what they are feeling and how to express these feelings without getting overwhelmed. Helping them learn how to identify their emotions and calm down each time they are worked up about something can help improve their emotional development and intelligence. Teach your kid to verbalize his feelings so that he can know what he is feeling, and does not have to feel frustrated that it is not getting translated the way he wants.
How to Help Your Child Identify and Express His Emotions
Here are a few ways on how to help a child with emotional problems:
1. Don’t Dismiss His Feelings
It is very important not to dismiss your child's feelings by saying things like ‘Stop that whining’ or ‘Don’t you dare lose your temper with me’. This will create a belief in your child that his feelings aren’t important and that he is not deserving of attention, leading to problems like low self-esteem in the future.
2. Help Him Give a Name to His Feelings
When your child gets angry or frustrated, help him identify what he is feeling. Label it and teach him how to label his own emotions. This will help him develop empathy to recognize his feelings along with others’ around him.
3. Discuss What You Are Feeling
Show your child that even you are expressing your feelings by talking about it. Tell him what emotion you are feeling and why you are experiencing it. Like ‘I feel sad that no one helps me with housework – I’m tired of doing it by myself’. This will teach him to separate emotion and its reason, watching you as a role model.
4. Reply to His Cues
When your baby is small, the best way to let him know you are acknowledging his feelings is to respond when he calls you. When he cries or screams, show that you are listening and that you're making time for him. If he grows up without adequate responses from you, this may create problems later in life making him feel that no one wants to listen to him.
5. Use Positive Reinforcement
When your child expresses himself in an appropriate and polite manner, praise him. This can help him to continue to express his emotions in a stable way.
6. Stay Approachable
Teaching emotions to your child involves showing him that you are there for him physically. Bend down to his level when he's telling you something, sit close to him while listening, maintain eye contact, and don’t mumble your replies. Show him that you are all ears and staying in the present when he is expressing his feelings.
7. Listen Empathetically
Let your child know you are fully tuning into whatever he's feeling by being empathetic and asking him questions like ‘You look sad; can you tell me what happened?’ or ‘How do you feel about that?' It would be much more effective than yelling at him or pushing the issue away.
8. Teach Alternate Ways to Express
You have to make your kid understand that it's not okay to take his emotions out on someone else. Help him express his anger in other ways – by channelling it in activities like running, swimming, etc. These are positive ways to express frustration or anger.
9. Don’t Punish
Resist the urge to punish your child if he throws a tantrum or shows anger. These do not help him express his emotions as he will feel that it is ‘bad’. This will result in him bottling these emotions up until one day he experiences a meltdown. Lead through a calm example (do not raise your voice and listen patiently), and give him activities to help him express his emotions better.
10. Introduce Problem Solving
Once your child starts to get a grasp of identifying and expressing emotions verbally, try to listen and respond with problem solving statements, like - ‘Okay, so how do you think we can make this situation good for everyone?’ or ‘Let’s think of a way you can feel better and what will make you feel better’.
11. Offer Physical Comfort
Helping preschoolers cope with emotions also means making a deep connection. Listen patiently to your child when he is angry, help him identify his feelings, and try to see the issue from his perspective. Giving him a hug will greatly help in regulating his turbulent emotions.
12. Resist Overdoing It
Don’t encourage your child to express his feelings without regard for others' needs. Hear him out, allow him to be angry and cry for some time but after that, close the topic by addressing the issue constructively. Don’t allow the behaviour to linger beyond a certain point.
13. Use a Picture Book
Using a picture book when your child is frustrated is a great way to help him illustrate how he is feeling by pointing out images in the book. This will help the child recognize facial expressions and will help him be more empathetic to other people’s feelings as well.
14. Practice Often
Practise strategies with your child for expressing his emotions every time he feels something in excess. Talk about feelings with your child during activities like driving or eating dinner. This can be a good support to your child.
It takes a whole lot of determination and practice from the parent’s side when helping a child express his feelings in an appropriate manner, even when the child shows no emotion. Encourage your child by prompting and listening to him, being available and staying calm throughout. Encourage and praise when he expresses emotions well and be empathetic at times when he's struggling. Be attentive to your child’s needs and be a good facilitator to his emotions. This will help him learn how to identify and express them in a stable manner, and your efforts will have paid off in the long run when he becomes a mature and empathetic adult in the future.
Also Read: Effective Ways to Manage An Out Of Control Child Read more
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Developing Self-feeding Habits in Babies
Teaching little ones to eat independently can be a messy yet fun-filled stage – for both the parents and the baby. Every meal is an opportunity for parents to help their babies explore and develop a healthy relationship with food.
As a baby learns to eat, he goes through several developmental stages. One of the biggest milestones in the development of a baby is when he transits from the stage of depending on his parents for feeding to being able to feed himself. There are many signs that the baby exhibits such as grasping objects with his palm, bringing hand to mouth, playing with a spoon, etc. These are the cues that he is ready to self-feed. This is a very crucial time for the little ones and they need their parents to guide them with the right eating habits.
Learning to Eat
Messing up or spilling the food here and there is a part of the learning process for the baby as he tries to eat independently. He needs to develop the following motor skills and be physically ready to be able to feed himself:
Learning the sensations of feeling, squeezing and dropping the food.
Coordinating with his body to be able to grab the food.
Being able to put the food into his mouth and eat it.
Different Stages of Feeding
Newborns depend on their parents for their nutritional needs. Feeding by breast or bottle develops an emotional bond between the mother and child, and the baby feels cared for and protected. By around six months, the baby is introduced to solids. Their first foods are usually cereal or cooked and pureed vegetables and fruits. At this stage, the child needs to practice how to chew and swallow the food. These early feeding experiences are a stepping stone in developing independent eating habits in babies. By seven months, the baby has a pincer grasp and should be given finger food. This encourages him to develop self-feeding habits. After nine months, he might try to reach out for the spoon or the food that his parents are eating. This is when the baby indicates that he wants to take charge of his own eating. In the beginning, it might be a little messy and frustrating, but with practice, the baby gets better.
Tips to Develop Independent Eating Habits in your Baby
Use two spoons - one that the baby would hold and one for you. Let the baby himself try and take the food on the spoon and put it in his mouth.
Chop the food into very small pieces which will make it easier for the baby to grab them and feed himself. For example- bread toast fingers or cheese cubes can be given as finger foods.
Allow the baby to play with the food while he is eating, as this is how they get acquainted with different kinds of food more easily. Of course, you can gradually teach them manners once they get older and start enjoying feeding themselves.
Get the right utensils – Try getting bowls with anti slip bottoms so that it’ll stay on his tray, give him small sized spoon and fork. Make sure the fork is blunt and rounded at the tips.
Give your baby light snacks to eat 5-6 times a day so that he gets more practice of feeding himself.
Make sure that your baby eats with the whole family at least once in a day. Seeing the other family members having their food can make the baby want to eat by himself.
Its always a great pleasure watching the baby reach for food and feeding by himself, even though in a clumsy manner. Every feeding time is a chance to acquaint your baby with healthy eating habits. It can be a great start if he is made to develop healthy and independent eating habits very early. Read more
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Breastfeeding is as natural as child birth and one of the most amazing and empowering miracles of mother nature.
The human body never ceases to amaze me, just when you think that you have peaked, it reveals an all new side.
My breastfeeding journey started on a rather rocky note, as Agastya was in NICU immediately post delivery and I had no idea what was in store for us. All the books and ante-natal classes had definitely made me realise the benefits of breastfeeding but reality seemed way too different.
After a day of not being able to feed my baby and he already having gotten the taste of formula, I felt like may be it ended for me even before it started.. I was clueless about things like breast engorgement or latching issues.
Having followed the principles of garbh sanskar and virtue baby for 9 months, I had taught my child to be courageous in the face of uncertainty and was surely not going to lose faith now. So we kept on trying and trying...despite so much pressure around to just give him top milk and make it convenient.
Also, the jappa maid kept telling me how I was not producing enough milk to satiate my "under weight" baby's hunger and how I was depriving him of a healthy life.
Well, to all those who didn't believe in us, we definitely didn't give up. My son is now one, and I exclusively breastfed him until 6 months of age, before starting on solids. I continue to do so till date.
Am sure every woman and every child has a different story and here on this platform we are not judging anyone for their choices but to highlight the fact that there is indeed very little spoken and known about this important facet of life and its nourishment. Breastfeeding is such an integral aspect of the whole process, yet such little importance is given to it.
The sleepless nights, the fear of being and sometimes just feeling so exposed, that vulnerability of feeding in public areas (with a stole or without), the frustration of being watched by someone or the other, the cuts, the bites, the soreness, mastitis...and everything under the sun that nobody ever told me about .well all this should have made me weak ...but I can without a doubt say..it made me much stronger ..and it helped me graduate from a tough woman to a tougher MOM.
One of the worst points was when I was attending a pre wedding ceremony in one of the top five star hotels in Delhi on a cold winter night. And hoping that I am dealing with one of the best in hospitality, I walked up to a female managers on duty to ask if they had a place where i could feed my baby. Well, I had to do it in the washroom, as they asked me to book a room for the night, if I wanted to do "something like that."
Breastfeeding is as natural as child birth and one of the most amazing and empowering miracles of mother nature...it has not only made me spend more time with my baby, but steal away those extra snuggles and smiles and connect with him at an all new level. It helped me trust my instincts as a mother and just know that he is safe as far as I am around.
I really wish we as a group of strong moms and caregivers can help bring about a change...so that no mom in future has to shy away from feeding her baby under societal pressures, and at least not for the lack of help. Read more
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My breast feeding journey.
The best thing in the world .
I BREASTFEED Not because I think I am betterNot because I think less of formula feeding momNot because I want attention I BreastfeedBecause my child want to be nourished from meBecause this is nature intended Because Couldn't imagine it any other way.The topic is very near & dear to me as a mom of 6 months baby.But it was not very easy. It is the experience I always treasured & inspired me to provide supportive content to others mommies.It was 1 March 2020, when I gave birth to my little prince. There was cord around neck of baby in sonography so I have to go for LSCS. soon after delivery my doctor put babies mouth on my breast for feeding.Omg what that feeling I can't describe in words. That was sweetest pain on earth. I couldn't feel my lower body due to anaesthesia but I was absorbed in looking at my baby ,his little lips trying to suck milk gently. I felt blessed! But after some hrs I came out of anaesthesia, & started feeling the stitches pain. Was unable to move side to side.Milk flow was less for 2-3 days but as a doctor I was knowing the importance colostrum(the first milk immediately after delivery)of & so tried to give those small quantity also.It was hard to milk come out so we have to start formula. I feel so depressed & sad. I think he didn't know me anymore, he didn't need me. I felt like a bad mother.I desperately wanted the bonding between us.But my husband keep trying to give him my breast milk. & after 4/5 days my breast flow increased. We stopped formula feed after coming home. Now he is on exclusive on breast feed. He had gained nice weight up till now.yes I do breast feed because it's a beautiful creation of god. Baby got nourishment, caring, love & increases immunity from breast feeding.It makes mother child bonding strong. Lastly it is best feeling in the world. Read more
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Dr Ghouse has added a new answer
Guardian of 0 children
4 hours ago
Q. which soap is better tedibar or sebamed?
Dr Ghouse
Paediatrician
3 hours ago
A. no problem u can use anyone. if there is no relief it is better you see your doctor for proper examination particularly physical examination if there is need for doing investigations to find out the problem and treatment ok
Rashmi has added a new answer
Trying To Conceive
2 hours ago
Q. Hi, are matte sunscreens suitable for oily skin? I am a new mother and I have to join office after my maternity leave, please suggest me a good one.
Rashmi
Mom of a 9 yr 8 m old girl
2 hours ago
A. Cetaphil SPF 50 sunscreen lotion is going to be a very good choice for you to use for your skin it’s one of the best things that you can currently use and I’m very certain it is going to be good for your skin options also otherwise if you want you can try consulting a dermatologist for that
Rashmi has added a new answer
Expecting Mom due in 2 months
1 hour ago
Q. can i use pain relief spray at time of pregancy
Rashmi
Mom of a 9 yr 8 m old girl
15 mins ago
A. It is an external thing that you are using not at all problem the problem is if you take any medicine without your doctors consult we do not consider it right neither as your doctor but an external spray is not a problem
Rashmi has added a new answer
Guardian of 0 children
1 hour ago
Q. hi iam 13th week pregnant my mind is completely in pressure stress and I cried alott does this affect my baby or baby growth
Rashmi
Mom of a 9 yr 8 m old girl
32 mins ago
A. All the emotions that you feel and you go through during the time of pregnancy actually affects your child as well after first semester the child takes a better route of the body starts becoming they catch all the emotions and the feelings and negativity positivity everything that you have.. so you need to be more focused and particular about your feelings this time
Rashmi has added a new answer
Mom of a 1 yr 8 m old child
47 mins ago
Q. #asktheexperts 300 vochure
Rashmi
Mom of a 9 yr 8 m old girl
18 mins ago
A. If you have any question concerning the parenting platform then please feel free to post your question once I know what are you willing to ask with all the necessary details associated it will be easier for me to give you appropriate help and response onto your question
Rashmi has added a new answer
Mom of a 9 m old child
45 mins ago
Q. My daughter (9months old) is not at all willing to drink aptamil and breast milk I am getting only 100 ml per day now. I have tried adding jaggery powder in aptamil but still she is not at all willing to drink.I tried to feed her with aptamil midnight when she was in deep sleep but still she woke up and started crying. I am not able to find any solution for this.Its been 2 days that I have started trying aptamil.So I will continue to try for another week and if she still doesn't drink can you suggest what can be done
Read moreRashmi
Mom of a 9 yr 8 m old girl
12 mins ago
A. For yourself I would recommend you Shatavari powder three times in the day to increase your lactation other than that since your child is six months complete you can give Amul Taaza milk to your child that is easier for the childhood digest and flavour is also good even if you want you can add some dry fruit powder saffron or turmeric for flavour change that’s also a good option to try these alternative
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