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What Age Gap is Best Between First and Second Child
There are parents who have just been through a pregnancy and their child is simply growing up when the thought of the next child starts to seem interesting. Having grown up in joint families or having siblings of your own can further fuel the thought of having another child in the minds of new parents. Almost all parents want that their child should have a companion just like they did. But at the same time, you might be tensed and worried about whether it is too early or too late to have a second child. Many parents wonder about the ideal age gap between siblings.
What is the Best Age Gap Between Siblings?
Age gaps between siblings can vary from simply a year to about 5 years or more. Each gap has its own share of benefits and challenges.
1. Small Age Gap
A small age gap is defined as that of a duration of a year or less than a year.
Pros
Your children will practically grow up together with each other, provided you have enough energy to cope with the demands of both the children.
The years of changing soiled diapers and listening to whiny babies will extend from a few months to a year. However, this would all end completely in a short time leaving you to come back to normal for the good.
Your older child will start feeling like an elder sibling and proceed to do things by himself. The younger sibling might learn a few things quickly by observing his elder brother.
Since both will nearly grow together, they will learn to share things amongst themselves. There might be fights or so, but a strong bond of friendship will develop between them. They will end up having a readymade partner to play games of their own age with.
With the right kind of parenting, the short difference in their age won't give rise to a feeling of jealousy or rivalry between them.
Once they grow up to a reasonable age where you don't have to worry about their needs, you can start focusing on your career and other life choices.
Cons
Giving birth to a second child within a year after the first one is born can be extremely tough. The initial years will be absolutely filled with the same routine of waking up in the middle of the night, wading through soiled diapers, breastfeeding and preparing formulas, washing an endless supply of dirty linen and so on.
The chances to enjoy watching your babies grow up will be fewer since you will always be occupied with one child or the other. This can easily get quite exhausting for both the parents.
The sleep schedules of your elder child might not be regularized by the time the younger child is born. This could then result in clashes as both children might require attention in different ways at the same time.
Having two children altogether can create quite a pressure on your finances since this calls for an extra crib, an extra pram, seats, all of which could be reused if the second child is born after a few years.
Since both the children will be growing up simultaneously, the expenses to meet their demands and the money required for their education will all take place at the same time and it can throw your financial planning out of gear.
2. Medium Age Gap
A medium age gap is defined as that of a 2 year age gap between babies and at most a 3-year gap.
Pros
Having a decent age gap of 2-3 years between each kid allows you to enjoy the growth of each child.
The elder child will be on his way to getting independent as well. He would be done with his share of soiled diapers and nappies and might be able to communicate his needs in a better manner. This could help you in looking ahead to another set of sleepless nights and dirty diapers with some satisfaction.
Your first child would be extremely excited to get in the role of the elder sibling. He might even take the responsibility of looking after his younger sibling and keeping him engaged, while you take care of other things.
With a gap of 2-3 years, your body would have recovered from the stress of pregnancy, delivery, and feeding the child. In 2-3 years, you will be back to your healthy state.
During the day, when your first child will go to preschool or so, you can focus on the second child, and schedule activities for the both of you.
Cons
With a 2-3 year age difference, there will be a few years before the siblings could play with each other.
Over the years, the age gap can create problems. The younger child might want to join the elder one and learn from him. But the elder one may refuse to play with the younger one, as he will lack the skill to even understand the game. This can lead to fights, shouting matches, and endless crying. These differences even out as they move closer to the teens.
As the life of the elder child changes, the younger one might inevitably become a part of it as well. For example, if you have to feed your younger child, and at the same time, the elder one has to go to the school, you will be in doubt. You might end up taking your toddler around everywhere, and he might not always get the rest he needs.
Taking your toddler everywhere might not even be always possible. You might need to hire a nanny or employ daycare for your elder child, which could eat into your expenses.
3. Large Age Gap
A large age gap is defined as that of a 5 year age gap between siblings or even more.
Pros
You get the chance to experience the full growth of your child until he reaches school. This allows you to fully focus on each child until they turn independent.
Having handled the cycle of an entire pregnancy, delivery, and taking care of toddlers, you will be calm and relax to handle the second pregnancy in a better manner. You will have enough energy and loads of time on hand to be able to focus on the new baby completely.
The elder sibling will be more than happy to help you out with taking care of the baby. It’s best to not load him with the responsibilities of a parent but just to allow the dynamic of an elder sibling with the younger child develops by itself.
Cons
A 5 year age gap is a large one, putting each child in a completely different stage of their development. This might result in both of them not having much in common or much to share.
Schooling will be a different thing for both of them since one might still be in school while the other makes his way to college.
Each child will make his own set of demands to you and it will be a tightrope to not let them feel like one being preferred over the other. The younger one might want to play when you will be busy helping the elder one with schoolwork.
In your heart, you may feel ready to have the next baby. But the body might take its time in getting pregnant and you might have to try harder than usual. There are certain risks involved as well with a large gap in pregnancy.
The groups you made during your first child’s toddler days might not exist anymore. Therefore, for the younger child, you might have to start from scratch and get used to the novelty all over again.
While taking care of your first child, you might have made the shift to working part-time or socializing with your friends again and getting in touch with them. Choosing another child would mean taking a break from work yet again, and you may not be ready to indulge in the baby caring attitude again. Social conversations too might revolve around future plans of growing kids, while you may still be engrossed in choosing the right kind of diaper for your newest child.
When to Have Another Child - Deciding Factors
Here are some things that you should consider before you decide to have a second child:
1. Age and Fertility
Age and fertility are inversely proportional to each other. Therefore, when making a decision to have a second child, think about your age and the how you will get pregnant.
2. Financial Condition
A smaller gap between consecutive children can put quite a load on the finances in the present as well as in future. A larger gap helps space out the expenses in a better way.
3. Age Gap
The difference in age between siblings has its own share of pros and cons. Take them into account while making a decision of when to have your second baby.
4. Babies within a Short Period of Time
This allows you to get done with the infantile care of both children in a comparatively short period and helps you pursue your career goals thereafter. But it can get quite taxing physically and emotionally.
5. Babies with a Larger Age Gap
This allows you to have time for each child in a focused manner, but at the cost of your career and a huge change in social life yet again.
6. Emotional Preparation
Of course, you will plan everything, you will be rational and think about finances when planning for a second child. But it is extremely important to know whether you really want a second child and are you prepared to handle it all. More than anything else, being emotionally ready is necessary.
Every family handles the choice of a second child in a different manner. No choice is better than the other, except for health issues. Choose what works best for you and take the leap in expanding your family.
Also Read: Getting Pregnant in Your 30s Read more
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Rashmi has added a new answer
Guardian of 0 children
46 mins ago
Q. #asktheexperts what to give children when starting solids?
Rashmi
Mom of a 9 yr 8 m old girl
46 mins ago
A. After completing the time of six months you should start with dal water and rice water followed by all kind of fruits and vegetables porridge khichadi mash banana mash potato mash sweet potato dairy products and varieties made made out of ragi Suji and oats can also be given to your child
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15 Mouth-watering Rain-Snacks For Your Kids!
Pitter-patter! The world seems to be dancing - the raindrops on your rooftop and your children in the balcony! The arrival of monsoon fills our hearts with joy, revamps our appetite and instills in our kids the new-found desire for crispy, hot, mouth-watering snacks!
Monsoon is said to be the most beautiful season of the year; the food is wonderful too! Indeed, you can make these foods all through the year, but they assume special importance at this time. Nothing quite like sitting by your window with a cup of tea and a plateful of pakodas, the aroma of rainy day comfort food drifting to you from the kitchen, and the children happily occupied with the interesting things Mamma made for them!
Delicious Rain Snacks for Kids
1. Banana Fritters
Fritters or pakodas are indispensable rainy day meals! They can be made with a variety of ingredients but here's a good way of adding your kid's favourite fruit to them! Enjoy this delicious recipe in the comfort of your home so you can fry them in less oil.
2. Cheesy Corn and Vegetable Cutlets
Cheese, corn and interesting veggies combine to make these awesome cutlets that can easily please any fussy eater. Trust us, these will be off the plate before you can even get ketchup!
3. Spinach and Cheese Pie
Perfect for cold nights or rainy days, vegetable and cheese pies make the best comfort foods and snacks for rainy days too. Psst, what better way of sneaking in greens into your kid's plate?
4. Fried Fish Fingers
Hot, spicy fish fingers can make your kids lick their fingers too! After getting wet in a rain shower, these snacks will warm you up in a jiffy. Perfect for fish-lovers as a rainy day food!
5. Cheddar Cheese Biscuits
These appetising biscuits accompanied with a cup of hot tea or coffee can make a rainy day complete. A simple, yet satisfying treat indeed.
6. Pizza Smileys
Kids can't resist pizzas and we're sure these smiley pizzas will bring a cute smile on your kid's face too! What more can a mom ask for? To you, your kid's smile is a super gift – thanks to this Italian gourmet food.
7. Coffee Walnut Muffins
Hot muffins, straight out of oven, are a delightful way to treat yourself after a long day. Coffee and walnuts make a healthy yet irresistible combo when packed together in a muffin. Yeah, this one is for your tired nerves Mamma, for we know just how tireseome monsoons can be when clothes refuse to dry and germs abound!
8. Samose With Masala Chana
Hot samosas are a must-have during monsoons. Make them at home to avoid the road-side junk which has a greater probability of being unhealthy in this weather. Serve it with protein-rich chana, trust us - kids are bound to come for a second helping. We say, this is the best of all Indian rainy season snack recipes ever!
9. Corn Chilli Cheese Balls
Older kids who can tolerate chilles well are going to find this recipe irresistible. Make it less spicy and younger kids may get pleased too – thanks to the cheesy delight.
10. Potato Bread Pattice
These bread patties are sure to turn your picky eater's interest toward food! One of the easiest and quickest rainy season snacks that tastes delicious with both ketchup and mint chutney!
11. Chicken Momos
Steamed momos can magically comfort you when it's raining outside. They are one of the most-sought-after hot snacks for rainy season. Momos aren't a very difficult recipe to make so you can involve your kids in the process and they'll love them even more!
12. Pineapple Salsa Sev Puri
The secret ingredient of this recipe is the fruit. The salsa makes a world of difference to the taste! If your child has just returned from playing in the rain, treat him with these crunchy Sev Puris. Make sure he dries himself first!
13. Golden Egg Bread Roll
Chatpata egg mix packed in bread slices can make really fulfilling bread rolls that can make your day during rains. Kids will want more of these, if you make them the way our mommy-chef's suggested.
14. Cauliflower Pakoras
Make yummy cauliflower pakoras with this easy mommy-chef recipe. Have them with a cup of hot coffee and we are sure you won't be able to resist having some more. These crunchy, tasty pakodas are one of the all-time-favourite rainy season snacks recipes, among adults too!
15. Crunchy Potato Wedges
No monsoon is complete without tasty french fries or crunchy potato wedges! This mommy-chef recipe makes it easy for you to win the Best Mum award from your kid!
The list of such mouth-watering, sinful recipes is actually endless. We're sure these will take you off your health goals for a while. Don't worry too much about the fact that most of these are fried - go all out and make them. Everyone deserves a little treat once in a while! Just make sure you shallow fry whenever possible, use a healthy oil, dab the excess oil with absorbent paper and make exercise a regular part of everyone's routine.
Which is your favourite monsoon recipe? Do share it with us in the Recipe Section! Read more
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Can Painful Periods Affect Your Ability to Get Pregnant?
Mild to moderate menstrual discomfort is a common phenomenon most women experience while having their monthly cycles. In some women, this pain or discomfort reaches a different level - they experience severe pain during their periods.
However, if you are a woman who suffers from dysmenorrhoea or period pain, you might want to know if this pain will hinder your ability to get pregnant. Read on to find out more.
Causes of Period Cramps
Prostaglandin is a chemical that is present in different parts of your body including your uterus, which is responsible for causing your period cramps too. The main function of this chemical is to regulate body temperature, regulate inflammation, aid cell growth, muscle dilation and constriction.
When you have your period, this chemical causes contractions in your uterine muscles and also helps in expelling the uterine lining. However, in the case of higher amounts of the chemical in your body, more severe contractions occur.
These severe contractions lead to severe menstrual pain and cramps. Dysmenorrhoea is further categorized into two types - primary dysmenorrhoea causes mild to moderate pain and is usually related to the shedding of the uterine lining only. Secondary dysmenorrhoea, on the other hand, could cause severe pain and could be indicative of an underlying medical condition that can affect your fertility or ability to get pregnant.
Can Intense Menstrual Cramps Affect Your Fertility?
Intense menstrual cramps or secondary dysmenorrhoea may indicate the following medical conditions, which could adversely affect a woman’s ability to get pregnant or conceive:
1. PID Or Pelvic Inflammatory Disease
Pelvic inflammatory disease is usually triggered by (untreated) sexually transmitted infections or STIs; however, in some cases, PID may get triggered by unrelated infections of reproductive organs too. One of the most common problems with this condition is that it sometimes becomes difficult to detect because the main symptoms such as unusual vaginal discharge and pain during sex either go unnoticed or are not present. Sometimes this condition may not cause severe pain, but it can still affect one's fertility. This is because untreated sexually transmitted infections such as syphilis or chlamydia may cause scarring in the reproductive organs (fallopian tubes, ovaries or uterus) and thus affect the fertility of a woman.
2. Endometriosis
This condition is one of the most common reasons of intense menstrual cramps that also affect a woman’s fertility. Endometriosis occurs when the lining, which usually grows inside the uterus, starts growing on other reproductive parts such as the fallopian tubes and ovaries. The lining growing on other reproductive organs weakens them, resulting in infertility issues. Endometriosis can be easily diagnosed through a laparoscopic procedure. If you experience pain in your lower back, pain after having sex, or nausea, there are chances that you may have this condition. However, it is important to remember that having severe menstrual cramps does not mean that you have this condition, or conversely, that if you have endometriosis, you won't be able to conceive. In other words, if you have painful periods and can’t get pregnant, it is not necessary that you have endometriosis.
3. Adenomyosis
This condition is somewhat like endometriosis, but in this case, the inner uterine lining starts growing on the uterine walls instead of on other reproductive organs. This medical condition can be characterised by lower abdominal pain, painful cramps and bloating during periods. There are several studies being conducted to understand why this condition occurs in women. Some studies indicate that it may be caused due to hormone fluctuations in the body, which include progesterone, follicle-stimulating hormone, and oestrogen. Adenomyosis causes intense menstrual cramps. However, there is limited evidence available on whether there is a connection between heavy, painful periods and fertility in this scenario.
4. Fibroids And Ovarian Cysts
Approximately 30 per cent of the women in the age bracket of 30 to 45 years may have fibroids, which are noncancerous tumours. These tumours are present either inside or close to the uterine lining. These benign growths usually obstruct the flow of blood, causing severe pain during periods. Your ability to become pregnant depends on the severity of the condition, which means that the size and location of the fibroid may hamper your fertility. In some cases, if a woman has fibroids and conceives, it can sometimes lead to an abortion or miscarriage.
Ovarian cysts, as the name suggests, are fluid-filled sacs that are present in the ovaries. Like fibroids, ovarian cysts are noncancerous too. They usually get better on their own; however, if they are big in size and present in places like fallopian tubes or the ovaries, they might cause a hindrance in the process of conception.
Does Treatment of Painful Periods Cause Infertility?
If you are in severe pain, there is no point waiting for your ordeal to get worse. Seek professional help for the same. In most cases, your doctor may advise you to take hormonal birth control pills to ease your pain. However, that may not be recommended in case you are trying to get pregnant. Some of the readily available over-the-counter or OTC painkiller medicines can prove to be helpful too, but many women fear that taking such medicines can affect their ability to get pregnant.
Some available research suggests the negative effects of taking medicines such as ibuprofen on fertility. Also, in one of the studies, the effect of naproxen was found to the delay ovulation in women, and further delays were noted in women who took higher doses of the same medicine. The impact was not that severe, but it was substantial.
Some women may have to go for surgical procedures to get relief from the painful periods. However, before the decision for surgery is made, it is important that you talk to your reproductive endocrinologist to know the effect of surgery on your ability to conceive. If your doctor gives you the go-ahead, then it may be a good decision to go in for the surgery as it may not only help you to get rid of the annoying period cramps but it may also increase your chances of getting pregnant.
If you are experiencing any kind of severe menstrual cramps, it becomes important that you bring it into your doctor’s notice to check whether it may affect your chances of getting pregnant or not.
Also Read:
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Eating Figs to Boost Fertility: Is It Safe? Read more
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Sameera Reddy Shares Picture of Her Baby Girl- Here's a Quick Glimpse of Her Pregnancy Journey
Sameera Reddy and her businessman husband, Akshai Varde, welcomed a new addition to their family this morning - a baby girl! This is the happy couple’s second child together and they couldn’t be happier!
https://www.instagram.com/p/BzzyjWZH1uJ/
Sameera, who insists on keeping things real about pregnancy and motherhood, has become an inspiration for all mommies-to-be. The new mommy shared an exclusive picture on her Instagram handle to announce the news.
Right from speaking out about postpartum depression to dealing with excessive weight gain and health issues during her first pregnancy, Sameera has come a long way. Learning from her previous experience with pregnancy, Sameera was more open to sharing pictures and seemed happier and more confident, this time around. Her smile says it all!!
https://www.instagram.com/p/Bv3a_ljnj7o/
A popular face in Bollywood, as well as South Indian films, Sameera rose to fame, but subsequently seemed to shy away from the limelight after her first pregnancy.
Sameera on Postpartum Depression and Body Image Issues
In an interview, Sameera shared her experience after pregnancy, dealing with weight gain and battling depression. She says, “My insecurities became too big and I grew quiet. I stopped stepping out, because I feared that people will judge me. It became stressful to be in the public eye at that time.” She also mentioned that these issues stemmed from being unprepared for the changes that pregnancy brings. The second time around, she was more accepting of herself and wholeheartedly embraced her pregnancy, which clearly showed in her presence on and off social media.
Here's a glimpse of her talk with the popular, Miss Malini, on the same subject!
https://www.instagram.com/p/BxeaxIvHkqB/
Pregnancy Highlights
With Sameera being more than eager to share snippets of her second pregnancy, we’ve put together some of our favourite pregnancy posts of the glowing actress.
Announcing Her Pregnancy!
Sameera announced her pregnancy to the world, with a cute picture of her bump.
https://www.instagram.com/p/BtxqvlgHVL5/
Water Baby
Wholeheartedly being a water baby or aquaholic, as she calls it, Sameera found swimming to be not just a hobby, but also therapy during her pregnancy.
https://www.instagram.com/p/BxMb-p6nuHV/
Girl Tribe
She rightly says every girl needs a tribe, and here’s a lovely picture of Sameera’s squad during her Godh Bharai.
https://www.instagram.com/p/By7K-_enRPO/
Picture Perfect!
Speaking of the Godh Bharai, here’s an adorable picture of the family, during the ceremony.
https://www.instagram.com/p/By4kM5TH1ko/
Babymoon
The family set off for a getaway to, you guessed it, GOA, to celebrate the (then) upcoming baby. Here’s a heartwarming pic of the actress with her son, Hans.
https://www.instagram.com/p/ByUhcvJHu5q/
Sameera is also behind the #ImperfectlyPerfect trend making waves all over social media, where she urges women to love their bodies. From posting pictures of an underwater shoot celebrating her bump to sharing videos without any makeup, she aims to spread empowerment and love to women all over the world.
https://www.instagram.com/p/BzuqBUiHNcV/
We wish the new parents happiness, joy, and good health! One thing for sure, is that with Sameera as her mom, the little one will have all the confidence she needs to make her mark in our world! Read more
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A Little Note for the Women Being Moms for the First Time
Life is crazy isn't it.
But wait until a human pops out of your body and hello life gets crazier!
Hence, not just a child but a mom is born. Being mom comes naturally well not exactly because there is a lot, I mean a lot to learn. Starting from how to feed your baby, change her nappy, put her to sleep and the list goes on and on. But being mom starts the moment you see her little face or maybe way ahead when you know that you have a tiny human being growing inside you. You eat right, sleep right and try to do everything right for the little one. And when she is born your happiness has no boundaries and your worries are limitless.
Being mom doesn't come easy, you get consumed. There might be a lot of help but you think it's only you who can do the best for her. No more coffee dates, no movie nights. Infact even career takes a set back. All for the li'l human being who is mini you. The eyebrows outgrown and pyjamas worn all day. You forget when was the last time you had seen yourself in the mirror. But everytime you hold her and look into her eyes, you see a beautiful mom.
Well that's how moms are made and it's all worth it, when there is a room full of people your baby will crawl to you and nobody else. It might be exhausting and life will be crazy with a baby but being mom is the most amazing feeling in the world. No other relationship so pure and true than to be a mom to a baby. Being mom is super power God gifted to women and it's just so gratifying.
P.S Lots of love to all those women who are being mom.
Disclaimer: The views, opinions and positions (including content in any form) expressed within this post are those of the author alone. The accuracy, completeness and validity of any statements made within this article are not guaranteed. We accept no liability for any errors, omissions or representations. The responsibility for intellectual property rights of this content rests with the author and any liability with regards to infringement of intellectual property rights remains with him/her. Read more
Dr Sameer awadhiya has added a new answer
Expecting Mom due in 7 months
1 hour ago
Q. hello, on my first visit doctor suggested me duphaston twice a day..so m taking it morning n bedtime.now on my second visit doctor added susten sr 200 one tablet daily at night ,as m already taking duphaston at night , kindly guide me when should I take the susten tablet,also m having dizziness after taking susten .
Read moreDr Sameer awadhiya
Paediatrician
1 hour ago
A. Regarding the mentioned concern your local doctor will guide you in a proper way and the doubts can be cleared accorjodingly .so you can discuss and get the solution for query.
Also online consultation can be taken on the platform and it will also be helpful in getting the proper guidance as there could be a detailed discussion which would be benifecial helpful in the correct manner .
Rashmi has added a new answer
Guardian of 0 children
57 mins ago
Q. can I take gevocet m during breastfeeding
Rashmi
Mom of a 9 yr 8 m old girl
12 mins ago
A. Please check with your doctor they will be able to confirm whether you can take this medicine or or not as a Dr who have a fair idea and they will know for what thing you are willing to take this medicine so whatever doubt you have associated there be able able able to clear it up for you
Rashmi has added a new answer
Guardian of 0 children
56 mins ago
Q. can I take zanocin 200 during breastfeeding
Rashmi
Mom of a 9 yr 8 m old girl
12 mins ago
A. I’m not aware about what medicine it is for I can only tell you that these basic medicines you can take throughout your lactation it’s not a problem the medicines that you could take before your pregnancy can always be taken during the time of lactation
Rashmi has added a new answer
Guardian of 0 children
52 mins ago
Q. #asktheexpert mam iam 33 weeks now when can I expect delivery date
Rashmi
Mom of a 9 yr 8 m old girl
12 mins ago
A. The basic delivery date is normally 39 to 3 40 weeks of your pregnancy whenever you are ready for your delivery and whenever you hit your labour that’s going to be the right time for you further move your Dr is going to tell you when are you going to deliver with the help of an ultrasound
Rashmi has added a new answer
Guardian of 0 children
49 mins ago
Q. iam 33 weeks pregnant now
Rashmi
Mom of a 9 yr 8 m old girl
14 mins ago
A. What is your question associated with your pregnancy that you haven’t mentioned clearly can you please repost your question providing all the necessary details so at least I know and understand what are you willing to ask and accordingly I can give you help and assistance on that
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2 mins ago
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